The Cleaner That Doesn't Lose Suction

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:26:32 GMT

I'm going to make a LJ post

HAHAHAH APRIL FOOOLS

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 17:52:19 GMT

In a few weeks I'll get to that annual review meme which will secretly be overridden of tales from Toronto and about how great I was at judo last week (got me my brown belt), that'll probably be my last LJ post because this place is dead and I hate it AND I HATE YOU.

Sat, 22 Sep 2007 12:42:51 GMT

INTERNET POST

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 16:56:22 GMT

Big Brain Academy is pretty fun, all the more for my being cleverer than all my family.

Mario Strikers is good fun, but ARGH let me win and stop beating me in the last 15 seconds please, I'm sooo close. :(

Zelda, lol yeah I haven't played that for ages, I seriously need to.

The Wii is still an excellent purchase and I'm nowhere near regretting it. Still waiting for Wii Fit, Trauma Center, Mario Galaxies or whatever and Smash Bros if these games ever hurry up and come out.

OH AND LEGO INDIANA JONES

I need to start reading the Dexter series, but mother sucks at finding her copy of the first book.

Also Naomi Watts had a kid, YAY SHE'S SKINNY AGAIN PROBABLY ^_^

I'm better than free sex with an Uggo

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 22:56:24 GMT

Baz: So we actually start publically drinking at 9:15pm
Baz: And then finally get a taxi to take us into town for 10:45pm
Baz: It was Carnival day in H'west, so hurrah we turned up late enough for all the horrible people to have gone home, so it was relatively polite and quiet and nice
Baz: Met a few schoolfolk stuff from youngeryears and whooped and stuff
Baz: Went to Matisse the worstest nightclub ever but oh god I can't quit it
Baz: Got some minor dancing gropage from some brunette woman hellyeah, she wandered off later when THE TABLES TURNED UNTO HER
Baz: And yeah, mellowed out with some girl and turned out she was called Rachel, and that apparently I needed her phone number
Baz: Also I could NOT remember how to spell Rachel
Flexo: :)
Baz: Wasn't sure if it was Rachael or Racheal
Flexo: Rachel is the American spelling, Rachael is UK
Baz: Ohhhh???
Baz: I thought I was just drunnnkkkk
Flexo: lol
Baz: I was VERY respecting of her as well
Flexo: so, going to phone her?
Baz: There was only hand touching [and also thighs I guess whoop whoop]
Baz: Oh my no.
Flexo: :(
Baz: "I'M DESPERATE GIRL I DON'T KNOW"
Baz: And yeah, then rendez-voused with Schoolfolk
Baz: Both of which have boythings, one of which is JudoTom
Baz: Some blonde hair guy started getting his groove on towards them
Flexo: heh
Baz: I tried my best to channel Downey Jr's hardass moment from KKBB when he tells a guy to "Just walk away do it." ... "So once again for the cheap seats, walk away."
Flexo: heh
Flexo: you should phone the girl though.
Flexo: I wouldn't, but I'm a bit girly wuss.
Baz: Which came out as "Fuck off! Dude, once again, for the cheap seats, fuck off!"
Baz: Only it was hella loud and I'm sure he didn't hear a word of my quotage
Flexo: lol
Baz: But he did indeed fuck off which was slightly fortunate, because Andrew wasn't about so there was little point in starting a fight
Baz: Though if it was just him, I suurely could have taken him
Baz: So 20 minutes of intense staring followed
Baz: And then burgers and onion rings yay
Flexo: yay, onion rings, haven't had them for years
Baz: Andrew gave up free sex with some Uggo, who he insists has a great body
Baz: But I sure didn't agree with him, but I was pulling 28 year olds so whatever
Baz: I have Onion Rings all the time
Flexo: gave up free sex?
Baz: The day before we went to Canada, I got some, Andrew called me a fag
Baz: Then ate half of them
Baz: Now we eat Onion Rings a lot
Flexo: heh
Flexo: I like how it sounds like Onion Rings is a euphamism
Baz: :)
Flexo: "Andrew didn't like onion rings to begin with, but I helped him learn to love them, and now we eat them all the time"
Baz: [He was offered free sex but was all "Nah I gotta get a taxi with my best mate, because that would be better than sex with you]
Baz: (there were many high fives)
Baz: And then we watched the NIGGERS South Park episode, or bits of it, on Andrew's phone in the taxi, YAY
Flexo: lol
Flexo: way for you both to be asexual.
Baz: And Rachel things, she had her number down under "Me" on her phone, so naturally, I saved it as "Me" on my phone, and sent her a text saying "Me" to correspond
Flexo: or gay.
Baz: I'm asexual, he's gay
Flexo: haha
Baz: [for women]
Baz: At the end of the night [THREE AM], had a text being all "Ok whos me"
Flexo: haha
Baz: WHAT A BITCH HOW MANY PEOPLE DO YOU GIVE YOUR NUMBER TOO WHORE
Flexo: oh meg, you and your drugs.
Baz: And I cut her up and she is in my dishwasher wait no
Flexo: So why do you like this nightclub even though it sucks
Baz: And I channeled Mario for some fukken reason "Itsa me! Boyo from the matissio!"
Baz: It sucks, but everyone who's anyone is there
Baz: And they also agree that it sucks so you're in generally good company
Flexo: heh
Flexo: I never had you as a nightclub person
Baz: And she was all "lmbo what's your real name?" and I was all "Baz" (I dried up on funny on that text, and she was all "Well baz, I had fun dancing with you" or some such thing, I CAN'T REMEMBER BECAUSE I'M SO LIVID THAT SHE DIDN'T CAPITALISE MY NAME
Flexo: :(
Baz: And then I made a very promsciuous, sexually advancing text message, which upon soberness really doesn't come out at all
Flexo: I hate people that disrespec' ma name.
Flexo: haha
Flexo: what was it
Baz: "Dancing isn't my greatest talent" - seriously needed at least a wink
Flexo: haha
Baz: And she was all "Maybe not but you amused me anyway! X"
Baz: She'll capitalise a kiss but not my frakking name
Baz: And that was that
Flexo: lol
Baz: ALSO NO-ONE STOOD ON MY TOE,YAY
Flexo: yay
Flexo: why would they?
Baz: It's purple
Baz: And nightclubs are crowded
Flexo: oh yeah
Baz: And nightclubs are kind of fun, because basically I just walk out there and be a cunt
Baz: To a whole load of people
Baz: It's like being on the internet only somehow sweatier and danker
Flexo: haha
Flexo: I guess it is!
Baz: I did much strutting
Flexo: "Nightclubs - like the bowels of the Internet"

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 08:21:21 GMT

I'm a pretty great guy.

(also Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is fucking awesome, I'm just watching it, and rewatching it and rewatching it, I'm addicted to the movie, it's a fucking piece of sex, and quite possibly my favourite film of the decade so far (Star Wars never counts in these things because I view that as part of my soul, not a mere movie!!!!!11))

Sat, 21 Jul 2007 08:25:33 GMT

So within 9 hours, and probably far less than that, the entire Deathly Hallows plot is on wikipedia.

Oh boy the movie's going to be terrible if it's anything as bad as the writing that summarises the plot.

Fri, 20 Jul 2007 21:16:22 GMT

The West Wing is great. Brilliant television, hilarious, great pace, just wonderful. Also EDWARD JAMES OLMOS turned up for the party and has loads of hair lmbo. Just over halfway through the first season, with the next two already in this house ready to be watched. The next six months are pretty sorted for me.

Also THE WIRE is perfect. None of you are going to watch it, of course. But I just gotta give it a mention, everything I heard about it that made me want to see it is true. It's slow-building, it grows like a novel, the pacing is slow and methodic, the dialogue is so goddamn natural that there's hardly any at times. The actors look like they were born to play the roles, or rather, it feels like they are actually their roles and that someone's just filming them (especially homeless character Bubbles, snitching on the drug criminals to the cops whilst appearing like a complete bum that you just can't imagine ever studying drama and learning how to act). I haven't seen anything that comes close to sharing realness apart from United 93. Sure there's no buildings blowing up every five minutes, no-one's looking for a bomb, and you're lucky if there's been one laugh in the hour-long episode, but none of that shit matters. Great drama, and the best television show I'll ever see, not necessarily my favourite, but certainly the best in terms of production and all that.

For example, there's that scene in every crime drama episode where the detectives are dialoguing in an almost noir manner about how the murder happened, it's thorough, it's convoluted, and I'll be honest I've always quite enjoyed the dialogue and the "Hey's we're so smart we can tell how this girl was killed", and it's always felt false and very much set in the TV World. Meanwhile, in The Wire world, McNulty and Bunk go into the room and barely speak at all throughout the scene (in fact only whispered expletives are heard), and through actions alone you know exactly how shit went down, the gunshot through the window, the angle, and even taken through to finding the bullet casing in the grass after it. Just feels so goddamn real.

There are a few issues with the show, with so many black characters in it, it almost feels insulting that the lead character is still white, and the female cop being a lesbian seems to be there for little more reason that to try and make it feel realistic whilst in fact just seperating it from the story and going "Hey look at this cutting edge", but it's barely noticable and for a series with 60 minute long episodes, the complaints end up being pretty weak.

And Dexter has fucking wonderful cinematography, it looks so damn sexy. Michael C Hall is absolutely awesome as the protagonist serial killer, there's no way a director told him to wipe saliva from his mouth whilst he was viewing a corpse from a distance, such a throwaway wink that half the viewers would surely miss the first time. Devishly funny, and the best way to handle the "Hey we've got to have a love interest for our character" situation that TV shows always have to crowbar in, Dexter falls for a woman who's been raped on several occasions to save him the hassle of ever having to have sex with her for sex always coming over to him as something "awkward".

And now for the JERICHO finale, which will be far less disappointing than the Heroes finale, if only for "NUTS". :dance:

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 21:50:19 GMT

So first fight was against a 16 year old, top brown belt from Wolverhampton, at the halfway stage I had two half-scores (curse the Japanese for beleiving that 7+7=10 and that 5+5=5) to his one. It was going pretty darn well, but my fitness is severely lacking, the 5 hour car trip, the sleep on the sofa bed, the six hours in the arena waiting to fight probably didn't help either, but I need to get my fitness improved. If I was fitter I would have won that fight, but I wasn't, so I didn't.

I'm drawing almost a complete blank about the second fight, I remember still being tired, almost getting a strangle on him, and later stepping towards his hip a little too much and getting caught for it. About a minute long, I'll say, against a black belt, and considering my severe breathing at the time, pretty pleased with how I performed.

3rd fight was against the Welsh (amateur) Number One, he's a bit of a twat, I was warned of this before. To try and suggest how I know this, a quick google comes up with his bebo account:

hay hay ladies im stephen im one party animal i like doing judo, going out with my mates and love warin my flip flops.
I love holidays in the sun, the picture is me catching some rays by the pool in majorca.
Just finished studying sport science in brecon college and going 2 uni in september look out guys and girls this guys up for a gd time.

He knew I was a blue belt, and probably thought it was going to be 10 seconds, and then he could go worry about his semi-finals. That shit didn't happen, I went out there too piss him off, tire him out, hopefully get him injured or something, and try and help out whoever his opponent in the semi-final would be. Mission Accomplished, he threw me for two half-scores after pretty clumsily giving me ample time and room to move, ended up beating me with an armlock on the ground (basically my biggest weak spot that a green belt could beat me with half the time). He was also the only guy in the arena to not have a sense of humour, after only getting the second halfscore, he turned away, thinking he had won, I heard the ref's score and proceeded to get up as quickly as possible and make a run at his turned back with the intent to throw him while he was offguard, this was a futile effort, and I knew it would be but heck I was having fun, it was my last fight, and maybe, just maybe the ref might let me grab a hold of him before he stops things. He didn't, the ref laughed, I was giggling away, giving the ref a wink for not allowing my devious advances and guys from clubs I haven't even heard of were sniggering in the background. My opponent didn't want to know, this fight had gone on longer for his liking already, and now I was taking the piss out of him, winding him up and he just didn't care for it. (This fight will be youtubed for your precious eyes as soon as I get the vid)

So yeah, my initial plan for the day was to ruffle feathers and prove that I belonged there with the rest of them, and I did that. Only 7 guys out of the planned 11 were in my group, which means that even black belts didn't turn up for whatever reason, and I can probably morally claim 6th place, though I didn't watch the other pool so don't know if the loser got any scores to his name. Normally after a fight, I'll chat to my opponent and see how often they train and just thank them for the fun scrap and whatnot, and it's pretty great to get respect from your peers. Sunday though was the first time I got other people respecting, people that were just watching and thinking "Man, this boy's come here with a great attitude". During each competition, there'll be about 5-8 fights that gets everyone in the crowd involved, not just the respective clubs and weight group, but everyone in the cheap seats and from god knows where too, my first fight was one of those, I'd put on a show that was worth people's time to watch which is a long way from where I was 2 years ago. But as great as all this is, all my LJ buddies have skimread the shit out of this entry so I'll leave my priase for Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang and The Wire for another day.

Sun, 15 Jul 2007 22:55:37 GMT

It's 6 minutes to midnight, I'm needing to get up at 5:30am tomorrow.

I'm high on sugar, my sister is watching House. I haven't been on the net until 9am yesterday, none of this bodes well.

Short story: 3 fights, lost them all but boy howdy did I ruffle many feathers and completely make my case worthy of why I should have been there at the North Wales Open.

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 16:58:47 GMT

6 episodes of The West Wing and holy shit is it ever great. The pace of the show is just phenomenal, the wit's great, it's so goddarn funny.

Plus they've already squeezed in House's Cuddy, 24's Milo and Scrubs' Ted. And I haven't got to the arrival of EDWARD JAMES OLMOS yet, holy shit will I freak the fuck out then. It's such a neat bonus seeing all these USA TV actors acting 8 years ago, it's like a little Before They Were Famous only about people I care about.

And father's hooked on it, which is strange because he just about watches House, and he loves 24, but gets fed up with all the great American TV I watch. In fact he's just ordered Season 2, so we might get a West Wing blitz going soon. I was going to stick to watching 2 a week, on Sundays to fill the Lost/24 gap, but we're at a point when there's nothing on any other days either. Heroes ends in two weeks making Mondays redundant, Jericho also ends in two weeks, ruining Fridays. Which just leaves Dexter on Sundays (starting today woooooo) and House on Thursdays. So West Wing is going to be watched a lot throughout the winter. (I'm already regarding this as winter because nothing TV-wise happens until Janurary.)

Seen two episodes of The Wire, and that's pretty smooth. It's purposefully slow and everything, so it's hard to get major excited about it, but everything's done pretty well, and it keeps my attention. Just hope that it all pays off as I've been promised it does.

The Prestige the book version is crazy different from the movie, halfway through the book and it seems like all the motivations for Borden and Angier's actions are incomplete. Costello Music by The Fratellis is a fucking great album and is just awesome and so loud. Kaiser Chiefs' second album is going to take some repetitive listenings to get used to. And holy crap I haven't read Fox in Socks yet, which NICK MURDOCH bought me via a strange creepy alias that absolute freaked me the fuck out. Trying to work out someone who knows my phone number, address, sock fetish and is willing to spend money on me gave me a lot of stress.

I need to picspam soon before I decide to get rid of this sexy beard. PS BUY WEST WING AND WATCH IT

Sun, 01 Jul 2007 14:14:09 GMT

tl;dr version:

Won 2 fights, lost 2 fights, got a bronze medal, West Wing, Wire, Kiaser Chiefs, Fratellis, Prestige, drunk, a hat, several macking sessions, a burger, onion rings.

long version, WHICH IS FUN ALSO:

Woke up at 5, stretched a lot, ate frosties, watched daily show, briefly saw parents before jetting off to Cardiff. Turned out senior weigh-ins weren't until 12, so lots of sitting about. But turned out that Ben was in the weight group below, so I'd only have to worry about fighting one guy from my club, Tom. Only due to low numbers, they'd mix the novices in with us folk also, which meant I'd be fighting new beginner Simon from our club also.

Club report: Couple of golds for the juniors, one came back from inevitable losing to get a great throw in and win, and then won his second match easily. A few silvers, including a white belt who came up against two yellow belts, four grades higher than him. Many bronzes because EVERYONE GETS A MEDAL!!!! Also all the medals are actually gold in colour, what the fuck WJA you're hardly trying.

I beat Simon, as expected, but he got a gold for beating the other novice (who was a green belt). And after that I got to fight Tom, so starting off with two fights against my own club wasn't ideal but hey. Our fight was pretty laughable, in that it just must have looked rehearsed. Many, many, many counters because we both pretty much knew what to expect and how to stop it. Tom got the win, but not until after a couple of minutes, the first time I've lost a fight without going out like a complete punk in ages.

Then I got to fight the other brown belt, he'd beaten the other guys at this point, and I'd watched attentively, and had a tactical gameplan, which I actually followed through with. I had to be quick, avoid getting close to him, and if I do, get the fuck out. I did exactly that, I don't think I've been prouder of how I've fought, once agin it took a couple of minutes for the loss to happen but oh man was I gutted. I actually thought I'd won the fight at one point, I thought I'd caught him offguard, I thought he had landed flat on his back as I threw him, I thought I'd given the Organisers a true headache with all of us having won one fight each among the true three. Turned out he landed on his face, not a single score from it, nothing, I was pretty heartbroken from that moment. Felt like a win had been snatched away by what must have been an impressive turn by my opponent. I shall make sure I fight him again, I shall have my revenge. But until then, I guess it had to be taken out on the green belt "novice", who hadn't won a fight, and after 18 seconds against me (first thing I did was check the clock) he wasn't going to win one. He gets a silver medal, I get a bronze medal. Bah, crazy.

Tom got silver, Ben got a silver for one win and one loss. Lisa, some 40ish yo beginner in her first comp lost both, but did pretty well. Pretty good day for NJC, could have been a wee bit better but hey, it'll do.

Got home eventually, ate pizza, drank looooaads of water, got West Wing on DVD (really nice sensible cover art, but it's all folded in on itself, about 1.5 metres long once you fold it all out. The Wire on DVD has ace packaging, with the pages "pages" to hold the disc, which I love so so much. Fratellis' album is ace, well I've only listened to the first two songs, five times. Keep meaning to listen to the other songs but something else comes up. Also got the Kaiser Chiefs new album, that's in the kitchen ready to be Washing-Up music that won't offend my mother as much as the Fratellis. Also The Prestige novel which after a quick flick through seems to have a totally different structure from the movie.

Then drinking, had two very quick pints in the Forresters in Neyland, where we haven't drunk in ages. The talk of the town was about two girls giving blow'n'handjobs to a fair few men in the streets the night before. Wonderful. Then the bus we were hurriedly drinking for turned up, we made several "Don't make me go all Benoit on you." jokes, and looks like we'd got a new injoke all ready for the day (Yes, don't worry I WILL be making a Chris Benoit post sometime soon, once a few more facts become all done. I know you guys can't wait for that.) Had ANOTHER very quick drink in The Friars in Haverfordwest before we had to run away from some fat guy that was being a twat whilst he was getting his next pint. So 3 quick pints after a dehydrating day in stuffy warm Cardiff Arena, so that was fun. Things slowed down a bit there, did some chilling out with folks. At some point found/was given a white plastic hat with a black tape tie on it. No idea where I got it from, probably the floor :( but it remained with me throughout the night and probably helped increase my promiscuous dancing and promiscuous snogging with some girl who was funky enough in the darkened havens of Matisse nightclub. As usual there was a point where she just completely disappeared, always have to wonder how attractive these girls I drunkenly get actually are, and how much they cry the day after for not being able to keep my attention long enough to not wander off to stand on a podium to do more public dancing. She wasn't blonde though, I still gotsta snog me a blonde one day (and, y'know, get laid).

Some fat blonde took the liberty of taking my hat, after some serious staring, she didn't keep it for long as I snatched it back. HOW DARE SHE? On my own frigging birthday of all days. And then burger and onion rings were a-calling, I got talking to some girl called Rebecca (rolleyes) whilst waiting for food, the whole (quite possibly drunken) discussion based on what a sensible name Rebecca is to call someone and her personal favourite form of her name (Bex, IIRC). I should collect all Rebeccas together some time and do a poll of their favourite thing to be called.

And came home to be mega sensible and not do anything much wrong, hurrah!

[Happy Birthday Rusty!]

Mon, 25 Jun 2007 17:26:58 GMT

So some guy gets a shorter prison sentence because the 10 year old girl he raped looked more like she was 16 years old, the judge says.

So just because a couple of guys don't know how to guess age, raping a 10 year old girl is suddenly less a crime?

So I go stab a hairy man in the face and claim that I thought he was a bear on the loose will I just get manslaughter instead of murder?

It's almost as if the judge is saying "that 10 year old wanted it". Fuck what is wrong with this planet, and why do I have this horrible feeling in my head every time I watch the news.

Bale and ju(birthday)do, judo, judo, oh yeah and a GIRL :(

Sun, 24 Jun 2007 14:17:16 GMT

time to blog i guess

AMERICAN PSYCHO IS GREAT. Oh Christian Bale I love you way too much. I wish you were still as Welsh as your birthplace (hey you were probably born where I work!), but the fact that you rock is awesome. American Pyscho will be coming to my DVD collection soon. But it's so hard having a DVD collection order now. I have three Christopher Nolan films, three Christian Bale films, and with Batman Begins being one of them, that has to go along with my other comic book movies. So trying to put Memento, Prestige and The Machinist in order is pretty hard because chronology means splitting up the two Nolan films. Eeek what to do. I suppose if I buy American Pyscho, I can just put the non-Batman Bale films in order, and then put Memento after Prestige and it won't be as bad. OH CEE DEE

It's my birthday this Saturday, I will be 20 years old. I am going to Cardiff to fight in a Kyu Competition, for the -81kgs, of which more than likely both fellow NJCers Tom and Ben will be fighting in the same category. Which means that if it doesn't get cancelled (apparently there's not been many entries but I doulbt that'll happen), I'll be having my first real contest against someone from my own club after 11 years of Judo. Huzzah! And then when that tournament is done, I've got to come home, eat something maybe and then drinkdrinkdrinkdrinkdrink. So that will be busy.

Next Saturday will see about 7 of our kids competing, some of them for the first time so it'll be interesting to see how well they do, also two of our new seniors will be competing in the lower grade competition, so we'll be able to see how well they'll do in true competition mode. Hopefully we'll bag a load of medals (and please some gold ones this time) for my birthday, because it'd suck if Neyland had a failuriffic day and I was stuck in a 2 hour car drive on my birthday thinking about failures. But we all know our stuff and we all work incredibly hard considering we only get to train twice a week so I hope it pays off.

Last Thursday, there were FOUR (4) new beginners on that mat, hopefully three of them will stick around (one of them either has Parkinsons or is incredible nervous about throwing someone who's been landing for over 10 years) and that'll be a great boost to numbers for when Ben and Tom get all silly and decide to leave for Uni. Yesterday, our two Brown Belt girls went to Crystal Palace (like 6 hours drive away) to fight in the Kent Open (I never knew Crystal Palace was in Kent but shrug), they haven't got in contact with me since weighing in, so I'm figuring it didn't go to plan, but having to compete after such a long journey surely sucks. One of them turned 16 today or yesterday so will be competing in the Youth (14-18yo) competition today (Two competitions in two days jeez!) so maybe they're waiting for today to end before letting me know how they did.

Also A 17 YEAR OLD UGLY GIRL PATIENT gave me her PHONE NUMBER whilst I was WORKING. and when I say that she gave it to me I secretly mean HER DAD gave me her phone number on her behalf. Oh god what the fuck I know I'm a sexy beast and all but don't ever give my your phone number if you are ugly and if I'd rather talk to the patient next to you called Ethel more than I would you. Thankfully I managed to mostly hide away from her after recieving wretched phone numbers and have been kept off the ward for the last 5 days so she should have gone home by the next time I get thrown there. Unless there's a God, then I'm screwed. Fuck you, God.

[there was later a cute legal schoolgirl checking me out which almost made up for it all]

I hate how I have to stress the word legal when I talk about hot schoolgirls now. I want to be 15 again.

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 07:20:14 GMT

blogging is such a chore amirite

okay so this laptop just sucks, the screen flaps about, the power cable input is dumb because some drunk dropped it about a year ago and a couple of days ago the power adaptor started smoking, but still works just about

so i gone and got me a HP 510 which should be here in a couple of hours (fingers crossed for City Link), and I'll be entering Transfer Central once I go through Delete Porn Before Father Starts Invading Computer Privacy Station. £380 isn't too shitty, and father reckons £70 or so could be gained for this piece of junk on eBay, which my father will kindly give to me (asking for so little for my birthday'll pay off yay)

It's been TV Series Finaleland these last few weeks months and I don't think I ever blogged about BSG either so quick reviews (non-spoilers, and hopefully any replyers will stay low on spoilers because I know some of my buddies (Jost&Nick) are still behind on their Lost and BSG):

BSG: Fucking awesome, pulled some Jump-The-Shark styled moves but being a sci-fi and having some very good writers in their team, I trust they'll stay away from the shark with a bargepole. Awesome writing and acting all round. Especially Jamie Bamber as Apollo. Only one season left welp.

Lost: Fucking awesome. After the yucky mess of Season 2, all is forgiven, the final few episodes all looked to be leading to somewhere huge and it pretty much delivered anything despite Another Jack Flashback :rolleyes: Only 3 short seasons to go, woop woop.

24: Oh god. Oh god I'm still completely bitter about this entire season. When the highlights of the entire season is Jack sliding on his ass whilst shooting someone in both kneecaps, and Scrubs' Nurse Flowers getting his face exploded, you know you're in trouble. A terrible run that thankfully leaves no cliffhanger and can just be ignored as I pretend it never happened. Maybe we were all asking for too much, when you complain about James Cromwell being in the cast (playing Jack's father, we wanted Donald dammit!), then there's not a lot that can be done. But every single episode contained a plot that had already happened in at least one of the previous 5 seasons.

Prison Break: Holy shit it hasn't even reached the finale yet and it's awesome. I'm doubtful that the Unnecessary 3rd Season can pull it off, but I said the same about the 2nd Season. Great thrilling television, this is what 24 used to be like in the old days. Prison Break has the best group of bad guys on television, fact. The finale definately won't drop the ball, it's up to the 3rd Season to decide if they want to do that.

Also how many peanuts does it take to save a show? The answer is 8 million. Jericho fans grouped together and spent nearly $55,000 to send over 20 tons of nuts to CBS Headquarters after they cancelled Jericho. The result is that there will be at least 7 new episodes which is deserved because Jericho's got really great in it's second half.

And I just saw Spider-Man 3. Oh dear. So much of it was great, too many villains complaint is valid but it didn't bother me. The story and everything was fine. It's just those things that got put in, those stupid little mistakes spilt throughout the movie, and there's only Sam Raimi to blame for that. Really makes you understand what Danny Elfman was on about when he said Raimi changed overnight. The reporters during the final clusterfuck, Stan Lee's shameless cameo, that MJ and Harry cooking scene, the hurried "hay sandy let's team up oks!?", that 90 minute mark where Peter Parker... it could have been so much better just by cutting things out, I'm sure people will be making wonderful edits of this film when it comes out on DVD. Venom's short onscreen time didn't bother me, but boy howdy the lack of time spent on Eddie Brock was criminal, also the ending wasn't a very "trilogy" ending in my eyes.

Bruce Campbell was awesome though.

lmbo this post is longer than i thought it would be tl;dr = british media sucks

Wed, 23 May 2007 15:51:46 GMT

20 days ago a 4 year old girl with a creepy as shit eye got kidnapped in Portugal because her middle-classed white parents wanted to get pissed up instead of playing Uno with their kids.

Over the last 20 days the British media hasn't been able to think about anything else (okay sure the standard 5 minutes of why the NHS sucks this week segment and the 1 minute of holy shit it's hot/cold today our planet is dying segment). They've focused all their attention on this little girl, in an attempt that it'll encourage 60 million Brits to fly out to Portugal and walk their dogs so that we can find white vans. Because when a kid goes missing, there's always a dog-walker and a white van aroud, alas this is Portugal so the dog-walker will probably be a gypsy hooker and the white van will be a corvette with drug dealers inside. I don't know I've never been to Portugal but I imagine that's what it's like.

So concentrated on this crazy eye-defected girl has the media been that the other 77 missing children in Britain are being ingnored. Sure some were lost years ago, but of that 77, 11 of them went missing this year, and we're only 5 months in. 11 other missing children this year, but hey, 6 of those are Oriental so fuck them, and another one's black so screw him. But that's still 4 people missing, 2 15 year old white girls, that aren't any uglier than some of the missing girls I've seen reported in the past, a 15 year old white boy, and a 1 year old baby girl. I've never heard of this baby, especially not for 3 weeks straight, and I hear all the time how "babies are the cutest things", but apparently not as cute as a deformed 4 year old girl. The baby is even of a "slim build" according to a Missing Children's website, and she's apparently been taken to Spain, which is closer to us than Portugal, and therefore that little bit easier to find. She's been missing for 2 months now and no-one's even heard about it.

But hey it's May, not a lot's going on? Is it worth getting uptight about one person getting more media attention and water cooler conversations than another? Well, yeah, because godammit people are acting like they know this child, that they love her and that they want her to come back home. Now let's pretend that she hasn't be raped a lot, full of trauma and probably despite being only 4 wishes she was dead, or that she isn't already dead, what's going to happen? She'll get found, returned to her family and then the news will remember how important Gordon Brown is and how the NHS needs to stop creating floods all the time. No-one will remember a goddamn thing except her family.

Oh hey and even the AMERICAN media are laughing about how pathetic my Nation's being. About how we're over-exaggerating things and losing perspective on everything. And our response? Our two biggest rating winners Coronation Street and Eastenders, famed for tackling talking points and handling important issues have both cancelled their baby kidnapping plots as best they can, because they might "cause distress", something Eastenders has lived on for 10 years.

In other news the only news important to my family (and we're white and go on holidays and don't leave our children alone to be took, ergo far more important and worthy of being in the news), I've pre-ordered Mario Strikers Charged, and will be playing Online Wii within the week (unlike Americans who have to wait 2 months for the priviledge). And Guitar Hero III will have the Stones' Paint it Black and Beastie Boys' Sabotage on it, hell yeah!

Tue, 22 May 2007 10:00:51 GMT

alcohol is bad

i love it so hard

in his garden ginger andrew has

a traffic cone
a traffic sign
a trolley that our local store uses to transport goods

many traffic cones and signs were toppled or "RKOd" (see: ) in my hometown today

i fear ginger andrew will have little fun when he comes home and converses with his mother

and i'm taking the Alberto Gonzales oath here, i cannot recall anything.

Mon, 21 May 2007 12:57:43 GMT

dear fellow LJers,

please find a cure for cancer, working on the cancer ward isn't very cheerful because of the lack of cure at the mo'.

kthx
Bazzu

Fuck you, CBS

Wed, 16 May 2007 17:28:16 GMT

Jericho got cancelled today. BUT I WAS ALREADY HOOKED! No fair!

And with Lost, 24 and BSG not starting until Janurary, House and Prison Break are the only shows I might even be watching before Christmas.

Looks like I'll be munching my way through West Wing and The Wire DVDs for sure.

Tue, 08 May 2007 20:48:20 GMT

LOTR plothole:

How does the Eye Of Sauron not die from dust infections?

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 13:20:04 GMT

R.I.P. Alan Ball 1945 - 2007

Everton 1966 - 1971
208 Appearances
66 Goals
League Championship Winner - 1970

Also happened to be the youngest Englishman to lift the World Cup in '66.

He did not appear to have a nerve in his body, and he was an inspiration to us all. Alan was always bright and bubbly in everything he did as a player. He went about his work with great enthusiasm and gusto and he always had a smile on his face. He was a sensational little player with great touch and great vision. He had great close control and although he wasn't a fast player he didn't need to be. He could see things clearly and always made the right decisions. - Bobby Charlton

I played with him when he was 38, I'd already been European Footballer of the Year twice but he could teach me things that I never even thought about. - Kevin Keegan

Sat, 21 Apr 2007 08:43:18 GMT

Hot Fuzz has finally come out in America, to mostly good reviews, and all the Americans are loving it because it's an ace film.

But America wouldn't be America if there wasn't at least one person bemoaning the release of this two-month old film due to it's obvious gloryifying of killing with guns (of which there are no actual on-screen deaths resulted from shootings) in a quiet village so soon after a massacre in a vastly populated University.

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 21:05:34 GMT

what the fucking shitting fucking christ is wrong with this planet

how insane do you have to be to want to kill dozens of fellow countrymen you don't even know and yet use some of your bullets shooting at doors instead of hunted down even more people

i can't even try to understand what the shit is wrong with our civilisation right now

also: american gun laws :(
also: i bet this guy had a myspace and the media will be all ":argh: INTERNETS!!!"

clicky for biggy

wheeeeeeeeee

Fri, 13 Apr 2007 09:50:24 GMT

Wii done gone released the internets proper like and this is me posting from it.

Furthermore the Life on Mars finale was wonderful television. One of very few britdramas that could enthrall me, funny, intriguing, and just darn great.

For some reason wii also lets me type as if on a mobile.

Wed, 04 Apr 2007 15:11:38 GMT

Just got a really good hour of Zelda done. That game is fukken huge and epic. It'll take me months to complete if the game really does take 60 hours to complete, I've just done my 15th hour and beaten the 2nd boss.

According to IGN's walkthrough I've done about 4 chapter out of 17. Huh. I've got a bow and arrow and magnetic iron boots and yet I still don't have a super dooper fishing rod. I also have a very comedic mailman chasing me every so often.

Think I'm about to go back to being turned into a dog again though, and those parts aren't as much fun and don't feel very innovative, the first and second parts were very samey. Whereas chilling with Link brings new challenges and shit going on every time.

Also six weeks until BSG Season 3 wraps up here. By glancing at the SA forums, I'm the only being that enjoys the non-sensical filler episodes. Although the last one slightly narked me off because Helo isn't awesome, apart from how high up his mouth is on his face. Also his child's mobile has Raptors and Vipers on it which was ace.

Also Prison Break has been given the go ahead for a 3rd Season, I, along with everyone else, was unsure where the series would go once they escaped prison after Season 1, but it looks likely that they'll have escpaed America by Season 2. I'm guessing Season 3 will bring an attempt to leave planet Earth. Still Prison Break is being hugely enjoyable this season, it's like a good series of 24 (see: 4 years ago).

Also apparently the world needs a FOURTH series of Grey's Anatomy AND a spin-off series based on one of the least interesting characters in the history of TV. What the fuck America?